The Deepest Bond Starts With Simply Being
One of the most profound lessons I’ve learned from Carolyn Resnick, and the horses themselves, is that the strongest connections don’t come from training techniques or structured exercises—they come from simply being together.
Over the years, I’ve witnessed time and time again how horses naturally gravitate toward people who take the time to listen, observe, and respect their space. This is why Sharing Territory is at the heart of Carolyn Resnick's approach to building a relationship with a horse. It’s not about control or performance—it’s about developing a mutual trust that makes everything else effortless.
In this blog, I’ll share what Sharing Territory truly means, why it’s so powerful, and how it can transform the way you connect with your horse. If you’ve ever longed for a deeper, more intuitive bond with your horse, this practice might just change everything.
Sharing Territory: The Key to a Natural Bond with Your Horse
The best way to build a deep bond with your horse is through Sharing Territory—spending time together without asking anything from him.
As your bond grows, so does your understanding of each other. This connection allows you to communicate with your horse in a natural way—one that comes from simply spending time together.
Rather than focusing on traditional training methods, Sharing Territory helps create an intuitive partnership where your horse learns quickly and willingly. When a horse feels safe with you, things like desensitization often become unnecessary because trust replaces fear.
Two Ways to Share Territory
- Spending Quiet Time Apart – Being in the same space as your horse but not interacting with him directly.
- Sharing Personal Space – Standing or sitting near your horse, allowing natural interactions to happen.
During these moments, small but important conversations take place. You’ll start to influence your horse’s behavior, shape his character, and strengthen his natural instincts to connect with you.
Horses are born with a herding instinct—they naturally move away from things coming toward them and follow things moving away. Your goal is to develop this instinct so that your horse becomes more responsive and connected to you. When you achieve this, your horse will move with you effortlessly, like a dance partner.
Building a Relationship That Lasts
Sharing Territory isn’t just a one-time exercise—it’s a lifelong practice. Horses need companionship and trust, not just training. Instead of focusing on performance, focus on the relationship.
Unlike dogs, horses need continuous reassurance to feel safe. A strong relationship requires:
- Being fully present – Pay attention to the environment, your horse’s mood, and how both of you feel.
- A calm and open mindset – Horses sense our energy, so being relaxed and aware helps them trust us.
- Patience – Let your horse get to know you on his terms, rather than rushing to touch or train him.
When you approach your horse this way, you develop a deep, cross-species bond—one based on trust rather than force.
Let Your Horse Come to You
When people first bond with a horse, they often want to touch him or seek attention. However, it’s best to let your horse decide when and how he wants to interact.
By being still and present, you allow your horse to observe and understand you. Horses use their noses and eyes to gather information, and when we give them space, they develop trust on their own.
Many traditional training methods involve handling a horse to get him used to human touch, even if he doesn’t want it. While this works, it doesn’t create a deep, natural bond. Instead, allowing your horse to take the first step toward connection leads to a partnership built on trust.
Setting Boundaries Naturally
As your bond grows, your horse may test boundaries by nipping, pushing, or crowding your space. Instead of reacting negatively, use these moments as opportunities to communicate your personal space needs.
- Ask your horse to step away from you. Just as horses in a herd establish boundaries, you can do the same.
- Move away from your horse when necessary. This can increase his respect for your space.
These simple actions mirror natural herd behavior, helping your horse see you as a leader. Once this mutual respect is in place, your horse will follow your lead effortlessly—without needing force or constant cues.When your horse moves in harmony with you, without hesitation, he sees you as part of his family. This deep trust creates a loyal, willing partner who enjoys working with you.
The Magic of Sharing Territory
When you practice Sharing Territory, your horse will:
✔️Feel safe and relaxed around you
✔️Learn faster and more naturally
✔️Respect your space and follow your lead
✔️See you as a trusted companion, not just a trainer
The Human Benefit of Sharing Territory
Beyond strengthening your bond with your horse, Sharing Territory also offers significant benefits for us as humans. It teaches us patience, presence, and the ability to find peace in stillness. In a fast-paced world filled with distractions, this practice encourages mindfulness, helping us reconnect with ourselves while forming an authentic connection with our horse. The more we learn to be present and listen, the more we grow—not just as horsemen/women, but as individuals.
This simple yet powerful practice transforms your relationship, leading to a partnership based on trust, understanding, and effortless communication.
With gratitude,
Nancy Zintsmaster
P.S. – If you’d like to explore how to deepen your connection with your horse, we invite you to schedule a complimentary consultation or visit our learning academy for more information.
